EPISODE 3 - Flying Foxes
Night of the Guavampire!
The greater short-nosed fruit bat goes by many names - Indian Fruit Bat, Old World Fruit Bat, Megabat and (my favorite) the Flying Fox. It's the bane of the sky, raining down terror and mayhem and all those that would stand in it's path, ruthless in it's quest to sink it's sharp, slobbering fangs into their ... guava. Or bananas, they like those, too. There is a lesser (or minor) short-nosed fruit bat but who wants to hear about that?
So who is this flying rodent-thing and what's his deal? Well, to begin with, the Indian Fruit Bat is just one of some 123 species of bat living in Asia, with most of those in India. These bats make up one-fourth of the mammalian population of India and account for one tenth of the total bat population in the world. That's alot of guano, people!
As with many other species, the indigenous people of india (especially farmers) are none too keen on the fruit bat since they (duh) eat alot of fruit. they are also carriers of japanese encephalitis, they make a lot of noise and they remind people of THE WAMPYR! but environmentalist say their natural habitat is being encroached upon by the (cough) 1 BILLION PEOPLE living in India. In case you haven't noticed, this is kind of the story of animal life on earth. okay, a warning:
THE NEXT PART OF THIS POST IS RATED "M" FOR MATURE - THERE IS SEXUALLY EXPLICIT CONTENT UP AHEAD. IF YOU ARE A TOTAL PRUDE, DON'T READ PAST THIS SWEET BAT PICTURE:
you kept reading? oooooooooooo!
An interesting note on Fruit Bat mating behavior: they are the only non-primate species known on earth to perform fallatio during intercourse. the female bat goes down on the male bat to "prolong copulation" and "insure insemination" - which is funny because it pretty much works the opposite way in humans (ZING!). what's more, the she performs this favor to the dude-bat WHILE he's got his um ... you know, batarang? in her ... uh ... oh boy, this is akward. watch this video, it explains everything.